Taryn’s Cock Review:

This is the best you’ve got for me, Joseph? I mean, sure, I can compare it to a pillar, but not a pillar of masculinity. This thing barely even has a head on it, just some weird slant like one side of an X. As in, cross this out! And look at that lack of hair, like you never matured. I mean I guess there isn’t a risk of it getting caught in my teeth.. oh, wait, no. I wouldn’t want to be sucking on this thing anyway! And those itty-bitty balls. Oh honey. Sometimes, size does matter. I mean, you can be a glass half-full or a glass half-empty person, but I suspect what you’ve got is barely enough to fill a shot-glass! Come on, now.. a lady likes to know her man can fill her pussy up with a good load; you could barely fill a pussy with that dick, much less the watery spunk it probably makes. Plus, girth? Let me tell you, little boy. I’ve got an incredibly tight cunt. I mean, that little pink hole is one hell of a squeeze, but this rod? It barely looks thicker than your thumb. How the hell are you going to please any lady with this tiny tool? You look rock-hard in this picture; do you walk around like that all day? I can’t imagine there’s many women willing to take on the chore of bringing you relief, so I just sort of imagine a perpetual hard-on just waiting for release. Or can you only get that thing hard when you’re alone? I mean, I know you’re dating, but if this was all I had at home, you’d be alone a lot! Because there are so many better dicks out there to fuck! I mean, maybe if you were a very good boy, I’d let you stick that in me for a little bit, just to remind you that my cunt is the only cunt you’re going to get, but you’d have to earn that particular pleasure. And by ‘earn’, I mean you’d better figure out a way to make me cum, because this dick isn’t going to cut it. Maybe you can give me a good fucking with a toy first; even the anal teasers would get me tighter than this. Joe, this package makes me sad.

taryn