Kensy’s Cock Review:

Aww, what a cute little dick Parker! Cute, not in a good way! Who wants a cute dick? Not any woman that I know! Cute dicks are for loser boys. Loser boys who will never, ever know how to please a woman because that’s exactly what you are…a boy with a little loser dick! Definitely not a dick worthy of ever seeing the presence of a beautiful woman who wants a real man with a real dick! How could that tiny little peanut ever please a pussy? It can’t even be big enough to make its way into a pussy! If you were in front of me, I’d be laughing my ass off at the pathetic little present you have hiding in your pants! I can barely even find it because it’s so small sitting on your grotesque ball sack…. Don’t you know that kind of dick scares most women away? We don’t know what to do with all that extra skin just flopping all around, needless to say, hiding the little peanut that you do have even more. At the least help yourself out and keep that ball sack shaved  around the base to make your small dick look as big as you possibly can. You know what your dick looks like? One of those pigs in a blanket hors d’oeuvres at the parties I go to. That’s how tiny and pathetic it is. Just big enough to fit into a tiny little bun wrapped around it and with one bite, it’s gone. I don’t know who would even want to put that in their mouth, though! It would be like sucking on a little hairy thumb! Gross! I hope that you take my advice and never, ever show your dick to any woman. You’d be better off joining a convent and hiding out as a monk so no woman will ever have to be embarrassed for you when you open your pants to show them the little thing that you have buried in there. She’d have to take out a magnifying glass just to figure out where it is! Then if she did find it, how would she have sex with you? There is no way that tiny thing is fitting into a pussy, so I guess you’d have to settle for a suck off with some ball playing, but I doubt I’d want to get my mouth anywhere near those hairy balls! All I can say is you better have some other really good skills if you ever want to please a woman in the way she deserves. With that teeny little button, she will be needing a lot more attention than from your tiny dick. Do the world a favor and keep your pants on!

kensy